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Parenthood Support Group

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Lucas Perez
Lucas Perez

Mom Teaching Teens Sex



The video's from one of our most popular reports ever, The Merchants of Cool, which, in part, looked at media corporations' marketing of sex to teens in order to hook the youth consumer. Remember those eye-grabbing sex scenes that first surfaced in the 1990s on cable channels like MTV and the WB Network? They launched a seemingly 24-hour sex cycle of movies and shows like "Cruel Intentions," "Dawson's Creek" and "Beverly Hills 90210."




mom teaching teens sex



One of the questions asked was does the media reflect teen culture or does teen culture reflect the media? What do you think? Kids are told how to play, how to share, how to act, how to say please and thank you, how to dress, how to behave, how to think, how to eat, how to brush their teeth, how to study, how to work, what to believe in, how to drive, how to mannage their lives, how to wipe their butts, how to do EVERYTHING their whole lives until they reach adulthood. They need permission to do many of the things that they do in their lives. Now you tell me. Does the media reflect teen culture? OR does it give teens permission to do ALL those things that they have wondered about. Sex and teen hormones, which can get the best of all of us regardless of age, is EXACTLY the very thing that teens are most intrieged by. It's not just sex but the root of sex which is relationship. How to become a person of substance and develope good relationships with other people. Something we ALL need to work on throughout our entire lives it doesn't come in the first 18 years nor the first 60 it is a lifetime endevour. If you don't believe this then why do you think there are bad relationships between people, countries whatever, all over the world. Relationships between people is a natural draw, but sex is the epitomy of relationship expression. It has with it the most dynamic of payoffs (children, why we are all here) and the biggest reprocussions either emotional or physical. Media addresses only the gratification part and gives lip service if anything at all in regards to the complex evolution of relationship building between two people. People have sex. Teens want to experiment with everything, all children do weather its building blocks, dolls or intercource. The media gives them the permission they need to do so, without any guidance whatsoever!


I live in the "OC" Orange County, California and raised my son and daughter, now in their early 20's, in the epicenter of the "Scene" complete with the full media onslaught dripping with sex and drugs. Only through relentless parenting that included up-front, factual sex education starting in middle school were we able to guide our teens through this craziness. I first showed them photos of what sexually transmitted diseases actually look like, discussed how disease and pregnancy would wreck their lives, set strict limits on curfew, demanded information on where they went and with whom and if a parent was present in-home at parties, showed up at times to make sure my kids were actually where they said they should be, made sure they worked part-time jobs to help pay for their expenses, never gave them a car for immediate use - they had to ask to borrow mine - in other words, being the most UNCOOL parent there ever was!


However, I also kept a case of condoms in the home for their use, made sure my daughter was under the care of a gynecologist (she was allowed to make appointments on-demand without having to discuss her reasons if she did not wish to), was vaccinated with Gardisil, and allowed for OPEN discussions about sex without judgment from my husband and I. As parents, we knew that sex would happen before marriage and made sure our teens knew all the reasons why not to have sex but also how to act responsibly when the time came.I saw way too many parents with teens hand over cars, with gas and insurance, not know where they went and with whom, and actually held parties complete with alcohol and weed! (They would get it anyway!) These are the clueless teens who are ill equipped to handle total freedom when they need rules, boundaries, and limitations on behavior and then experience the consequences unacceptable behavior the most! It was the easy way out for these parents because our way was the hardest way - raising teens is the worst because of the battle of wills it brings. Parents have to go the distance especially when teens are nasty, irrational, impatient, yell, scream, are sleep deprived, and beg for freedom. Parents have the tools to overcome the "media" but don't exercise control measures because it's HARD WORK to do so.


I'm 17, and it's only now, after watching this, that I've realized how much of an "epidemic" teen sex is, where it comes from, and how it's kept up to look "cool" and even the "norm". And the narrator's description of it as a "giant feedback loop" hits spot on, in my opinion. But I think another big reason for the teen obsession with sex is the WANT for sex. And I find it disturbing that media moguls make and sell shows that promote teen sex, because they know that us teens have raging hormones and strong desires for making love, and that's prime time for making business for them. Thank you to FRONTLINE for posting this, otherwise I would not be thinking so strongly about it.


if god didn't want teenagers to have sex, we wouldn't experience puberty until we reach 21 or 18 or 30 or whenever the moral high grounders think sex is safe. the thing is, sex is never safe. it never was and never will be. it's a lesson learned one way or another, sooner or later. it's not like teens started having sex because of TV. for thousands of years, the human race has procreated because teens have sex. good luck trying to stop nature at its seed.


These are blanket statements that are said to be backed by "researched" statistics. Who is doing the research? How is this research completed? I do not remember any surveys administered to the many teens I have taught. Before making any sort of judgement call or statement, we really should look into this so called research of teen promiscuity, and yes, in today's society, it is much easier to influence the world of teens and children via media. Why do you think billions of dollars are budgeted for PR and advertisement?


I do believe that if parents and society hold teens to higher standards, they will perform at those high standards. It is to easy to say that teens will be teens and will engage in sex because of thier developmental state. It is much more difficult to educate those same teens about sexuality, its consequences and its true "sacred" purpose (to strengthen a sincere relationship). Think about it. YOur body is your most intimate and sacred possession. Do you really want to freely share it? What about the psychological and sometimes physical consequences (there are other physical consequences besides pregnancy and STDs) for female teens who are sexual? Why is there such a great need for Gardisil? There wasn't a need before. Why are female teens so insecure and struggling with their images instead of the smartness? I have girls pretend to be dumb, so the guy they like is not intimdated.


I am 22, second eldest of 7 kids, college student- my parents never ascribed to the "they will do it anyway" abject failure of a parenting philosophy. They simply taught me by example mostly, through love, how to make the right decisions on my own. They stuck together despite unreal marital difficulties, extremes of poverty, mental illness, familial strife, loss. They insisted on teaching a moral view which they have spent a long time developing and constantly challenge and sculpt. They didn't have to be "cool" or "uncool" parents because they operated outside those pitiful boundaries. They weren't my friends they were my parents and thank God for that. They are HONEST!


Today's parents have a bit of a double standard; somehow, they think that they can consume trashy media without having it trickle down to their kids. While teens are watching their teletrash, mother revels in "Sex and the City". Does she think her daughters will never see this show? In fact, this is an excellent example. In 2004, I went shopping at The Icing (a now-defunct subsidiary of Claire's Accessories) and saw three stylish notebooks for sale. One's front cover declared "I'm a Carrie" and was decorated with an image of a leopard-print high heel; the second stated "I'm a Miranda", with a leopard-print briefcase; the third, "I'm a Samantha", featured a leopard-print bra. "Sex and the City" was ostensibly aimed at women in their thirties. The Icing's primary market was teens and twentysomethings.


This is what tv created.Movies ,stars, influence kids and not their parents.The tv is taking over parenting , which is bad.No responsibility and disgusting manors of teens ,lack of discipline.


I as a teen of today do not talk about sex and violence on a regular basis, like this documentary states, it seems like the adults who made this movie make teens out to be a different type of species. The adults also talk about teen like they have never been one themselves. If so the topics are being discussed you as adults cannot tell us what to talk about and what to think about. I also think its better to talk about sex more openly so we can know how the act affects us at such a "young" age and what our parents views were when they were teens. As I conclude my thoughts teens should not be talked about and analyzed, but WE should be talked with about our so called culture. REMEMBER ADULTS you were also teens once as well.


Personally as a teen I think that adult figures on t.v. complain about how parents abiously aren't good role models. But look at t.v. obviously we get alot of the oh hey lets bang because it has to be cool. Adults hold teens to be perfect and that they can't like certain things no offence people but teens look to what parents think are acceptable and what they like to influence what they like and what they think are cool. Parents avoid talking about sex. i think they need to start talking about it because then when the teens start watching the high rated programs they will know abstinence is better than going out and banging who ever. Its really not possible to stop it. the mass corruption of todays teens is horrifying. im one of those teens that beleives its not right to go out and have sex befor marriage but im not going to critisize 041b061a72


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